The comedown is a comin’ and there’s nothing worse than having to go back to work after a 3 day bender consisting of zero sleep, copious amounts of substances and a diet of hot chippies and Mi Goreng noodles.

If this sounds like you right now, don’t you worry your little serotonin deprived head. We’ve built a foolproof 10 step recovery guide for all the Splendour bender-ers who have just spent the weekend ruining their livers and lives and are just coming to terms with the fact that they start back at work tomorrow.

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Step 1:

First things first, take a big shower and wash the remnants of the past three days down the drain.

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Step 2:

Don’t forget to eat. Get a big fat breaky into ya on the way home. Avo, bacon, eggs … the works. Feed your body with some fats and carbs to help soak up the alcohol and push out the toxins a little faster.

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Step 3:

Water, water and more water. We’ve said it before and we’ll say it again, your body needs to be hydrated in order to recover, dumbass. 

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Step 4:

If water just isn’t doing the trick then speed up the recovery with a bottle of hydralyte, a bit of spirulina and a sh*t tonne of vitamins.

Step 5:

Rest up big boy, you should plan to spend the rest of your day sleeping and lazing around. Don’t worry about unpacking your nasty ass festival ‘fits just yet, you can do that once your liver isn’t in a state of paralysis.

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Step 6:

Ginger shots all round. They may hurt on the way down but it’ll help you get back on track to a full and speedy recovery before the week is out.

Step 7:

Try to prepare your lunches for the next few days with vegetables and protein so you don’t end up Uber Eats-ing Maccas and Subway for every meal.

Step 8:

Exercise. Probably the last thing you want to hear right now but if you get a bit of cardio in over the next few days you’ll be in a much happier and healthier state. You’re going to need all of the endorphins you can get.

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Step 9:

Give yourself a break, don’t punish yourself for going a little harder than you expected. Don’t push yourself back into full speed too fast or you’ll be run down and miserable for a lot longer. You’re not alone in this state my friends, be kind to yourself.

Step 10:

The best trick for getting over a festival comedown is to do it all over again. Buy tickets for the next big festival with your crew and you won’t feel like your life is falling apart and you’ll never find happiness again.

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Bank balance busted after Splendour? Stay tuned for a cheeky festival giveaway coming soon that’ll be sure to cheer you up. For first dibs, make sure you subscribe and keep your eyes peeled for a special surprise in your inbox next week.

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